In show business, time is always the biggest constraint. Everyone only has so much time to become culturally relevant, and so much time to get the band back together to maintain that status. Instead of cracking the elusive universal mystery of eternal youth, Hollywood seems to have forsaken the notion of anything becoming too old to still be profitable. Harrison Ford returned to Blade Runner thirty-five years later, while Emily Blunt stepped into the shoes of Mary Poppins in Mary Poppins Returns over fifty years after Julie Andrews. Tom Cruise lit up the box office by flying one more mission as Maverick in Top Gun: Maverick, and will be racing another lap in the equally long-gestating Days of Thunder 2.

So, it shouldn’t be much of a surprise that Practical Magic, the 1998 mid-budget box office disappointment that also received negative critical remarks, is getting a belated sequel. A passionate fanbase can be thanked for this return, themselves longingly holding on to the unapologetic themes of sisterhood and comedic witchcraft, elements not as easily found in mainstream cinema as they probably should be. Where else can one see a witch’s domestic abuser boyfriend be killed by her sister, buried in a bed of roses, risen from the dead as a possessive demon, and then exorcised by a neighborhood watch of snooty suburban housewives?

Fans of that original film will take pleasure in the many callbacks and returning elements of this sequel. Aunts Franny (Stockard Channing) and Jet (Dianne Wiest) are back with a sly smile as they continue to be the talk of their small New England town. They’re like Etsy witches for the lovelorn wives, only their spells actually work. Not casting any more spells is Sally (Sandra Bullock), who gave away her powers after the family curse killed her second husband, Gary (Aidan Quinn doesn’t return as a corpse). She also made her sister Gillian (Nicole Kidman) promise to never reveal to Sally’s two daughters, Kylie (Joey King, who previously played Kidman’s daughter in A Family Affair) and Antonia (Maisie Williams), that they are also witches. Never mind that the daughters were pretty much full participants in all the prep work for the original film’s exorcism prep, and were around the aunts long enough to likely get a hint of what’s going on.

The truth eventually rears its ugly head for Kylie when her boyfriend Gideon (Xolo Maridueña of Blue Beetle) is critically injured the morning after they profess their love for each other. Realizing that the curse is real and she’s been lied to her entire life, she runs away to figure out how to break it. This involves going to England, where Sally and Gillian chase after and recruit the help of the dashing witchcraft professor Ian Wright (Lee Pace).

For all the reasons I gave above for why the first film became a cult (or should I say coven?) favorite, the plot was very much not one of them. That’s why it’s a confusing shame as to why the collection of screenwriters - Akiva Goldsman, Georgia Pritchett, and Kelly Marcel - felt the need to stuff so much of it in here. At nearly 130 minutes in length compared to the original’s 100, there’s a clear feeling that stuff is being made up on the spot, with vague witchcraft words used to paper over thinly developed reasons for these characters to do half the stuff they do. Of course, all movies are just made up reasons for things to happen. But this one feels like it needed to prove its own existence, or was tricked into thinking this is what the people wanted.

Truly, the only thing people were clamoring for was more chemistry between Bullock and Kidman. Together they are a winning combination, trading heartfelt speeches and witty one-liners without skipping a beat all these years later. Clad in black as a reclusive librarian, Bullock’s impulse is to say no to everything, the walls built from a past full of pain. That sad sack energy would be a lot more tiring if it weren’t channeled through someone as effortlessly watchable as her, who also gets a fun sparring partner in Kidman’s grown-up wild child.

Try as they might to become the next generation, King and Williams are stuck on their tracks, given little opportunities to make moments for themselves. At least King gets to go off on her own journey, while Williams stays put in a hospital (her character is a doctor) for almost the entire runtime. Director Susanne Bier and cinematographer Simon Duggan don’t offer any sumptuous visuals, preferring an overlit, washed-out look. There’s no warmth or autumnal hues, just a bland palette best served for streaming.

Pun fully intended, but Practical Magic 2 does not recapture the magic of the original. I’d normally add the phrase “try as it might” to the start of that sentence, but it never seemed like the filmmaking team tried in the right ways. When you’ve got several extremely talented actresses in your lineup, your best course of action is to get out of the way and let them do their thing. In trying to do too much, Practical Magic 2 casts a spell of clumsiness, tripping over its own feet to an unsatisfying return.

Warner Bros. Pictures will release Practical Magic 2 in theaters nationwide on September 11th.